How do you shop? Are you a bargain hunter always searching for the best deals, or are you first in line to get the latest and greatest thing? This would mean you’re willing to pay full price for what you want, because you want it first! You might even fall into a third category of consumers searching for quality. I’m definitely the bargain hunter!
I raised two children as a single mother. There were many times I had to be “fiscally creative” to survive. I never really felt financially safe or secure. This is a symptom of a poverty mindset. A poverty mindset is a mentality rooted in fear. Fear of lack. Fear of never having enough money or resources to meet your needs. Fear that you’re not worth value, or the cost.
Honestly guys, I still wrestle with a poverty mindset. Me and Jesus, we’re working on it! One of the best ways to overcome a poverty mentality is to start being generous! It breaks up the negative patterns and creates new habits in you brain. It’s like creating a new habit to work out by going to the gym. Eventually it becomes automatic.
The biggest area of the poverty mentality I still struggle with the most with is believing in my own value and self worth.
A couple years ago, I was bargain hunting for a new computer bag. In my search, I came across a designer handbag that I fell in love with. I’m not a super girly-girl so it caught me a little off guard. I don’t own designer anything! I immediately looked at the price and quickly determined I would never be able own this purse.
I told myself it was simply a luxury I could not afford.
Last December I walked into a discount clothing store. I noticed they had items from the handbag designer I loved. I looked around to see if maybe, just maybe they actually had the pattern I fell in love with. They did not. Two weeks later I returned. Disappointment set in as I didn’t see any handbags with my beloved pattern.
Looking over a different pattern from the same designer I thought, “This is pretty. I can afford this handbag and at least I could say I own one of her bags.” I immediately heard the Lord say, “You can settle for this, or you can wait for the one you really want”. I was so mad! I knew exactly what he was saying. I was willing to settling for a cheap deal. There was no argument, only conviction. As I put the bag down and proceeded to leave . . . there it was. Just to the right as I turned turned to walk away I saw my designer bag in the pattern I fell in love with!
Had I settled for the one I didn’t want, I would have completely missed the one I really wanted!
I made the purchase at a fraction of the original price! Elated as I was, I quickly realized this little crossbody purse was really a glorified wallet. I was like one of the wicked step-sisters in Cinderella trying to make her foot fit in the glass slipper. The scavenger hunt continued. I purchasing several coordinating pieces of my beloved design, but I did not have any success in finding a full size handbag.
I traveled to 3 states and visited several stores on my hunt with no avail. I was so sure God was going to bring me to the right place, at the right time to find the handbag of my dreams at a discounted rate. Why? Cause I’m crazy enough to believe all good gifts come from the Lord. Because I’m crazy enough to believe God cares about the big things, and the little things.
I hit a breaking point.
At the end of a long day searching for my designer handbag, I fought back tears as I said to God, “God, I don’t understand? This is the last store and I didn’t find what I was looking for. Why not? I thought you were showing me how you were providing something I wanted in a way I can afford it and I thought you were bringing me to my hearts desires even if it was in this small thing. I really believed you were going to do it so why am I not able to find this bag anywhere? Did I miss it somewhere else?” Just then I had a flash in my mind of the only place online I had seen this bag still in stock, but it was at full price. Like, full designer handbag price. Just then, at the same moment I heard the Lord ask me, “Are you willing to pay the full cost for what your heart truly desires?” I gained my composure just enough to walk out of the store. I almost made it to my car before the tears flooded down my face.
This wasn’t about a designer handbag.
This wasn’t about shopping for a discount.
This wasn’t about greed or materialism.
I knew exactly what the Lord was asking me. This was about me willing to assign value to myself. To assign value to my hearts desires. To break off the remnants of a poverty mentality. I needed to partner with God to see my worth they way he sees me. I was worth the cost of his yes to die for me to live. He sees you with the same value my friend.
This was God asking me to give him my yes at whatever the cost.
Did I want it bad enough? Could I put my money where my mouth was? “Lord I want this purse, but bring me to it at a discount” “Lord, I really love what I found so far, but they aren’t the full size, can you help me find the one I really need?” the Lord, “Sure, but there’s a cost and it’s at the full price. How bad to you want it? Are you willing to sacrifice for it?”
Ladies and Gentlemen, I am a proud owner of a genuine leather handmade designer purse with the pattern I fell in love with which I paid more money for than anything I own outside of my car, my home, and half a college education. Selah. . .
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